Getting closer to d-day

As the day of my departure and arrival at the PCT draws closer, I get more nervous. I know thi is my last shot. I only have one more chance to do this. To be honest, I an almost scared. Very few times in my life am I truely scared. But this is a little nerve racking. I feel that I am more ready than I've ever been, but at the same time, I've grown comfortable with the little life I've led in the past year, and I know that I am going into uncertainty and inconvience, pain, and weariness. I think I need it though. Maybe I can find that peace I've been searching for, for so many years. Or maybe I'll just quit and go back to my old job and be miserable. Whatever happens I know that I have to dig deep. I have to find that drive I once had and push harder than I've had to in my civilian life. My parents do not approve of what I am doing of course. My dad especially, but I feel I need to do this. I haven't felt the need to get their approval in years it really doesn't matter how they feel about this. But I need to do it.

I must go

I sit here thinking about my next step. My next adventure and what it entails. It's a bit unnerving and I'm a bit terrified of the possibility that I might fail. But I can't stay here doing nothing. I haven't scaled mountains and crossed deserts and oceans, been to many different countries by sitting at home working a nine to five. There is a HUGH world out there and I have barely seen a fraction of it. I have seen so many mountains and the land from the top if those mountains. I've seen the curvature of the earth before, you don't walk away from that and not be moved. There is so much to bee seen and done. There is no reason to sit home and do nothing. I must go. I must explore.